Reasons to vote for Hillary

1 She’s not Trump.

2. She’s a female. This really really matters for some reason. In fact, it’s one of her best attributes when comes to being the next US president. Forget about her obsessive lying, her corrupt activities, the fact that she probably should be in jail. If you vote for Hillary, your vote will make history.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s taken way too long to get a female president but I won’t be celebrating at all come the results. I have no hope in Hillary, I have no hope in Trump. What little hope I had in humanity and rationality has been all but crushed over this election.

So let’s just get these four years over with, shall we? Let’s just get through this and hope the already faltering idea of free speech isn’t too damaged by the end of it. God knows parody is already dead, pointless. How can you successfully parody this election? What would be the point?

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